UPDATE: Rochester High School Copes With Student Suicide

A senior student council member committed suicide early Friday, and the school community spent the day trying to cope.

The school's Critical Incidence Team, which includes teachers, counselors and administrators, spent the day at the high school helping students deal with the news, said Debra Hartman, community relations manager for .

The girl, who students say was a member of the yearbook staff and helped with school blood drives, among other activities, lived in Auburn Hills.

Auburn Hills Fire Lt. Tom Hardesty said his department responded to a call at 2:20 a.m. to find the girl dead in the bathroom of her home.

A friend of the girl's had called the fire department for help after she received a text message from the girl that led the friend to believe she might hurt herself, Hardesty said.

The Auburn Hills department notified school officials Friday morning, Hardesty said.

A school reacts

With a tight-knit community and a school of about 1,700 students, word of the girl's death spread quickly by Twitter, Facebook posts and word of mouth. Students and staff in and around the school Friday were visibly upset.

Messages and Tweets of "RIP" were popular among students.

The loss was summed up on the school's Facebook page: "Rochester High lost a smart and talented student today."

On Friday night, the school community gathered for the planned Rochester Idol competition; some in attendance spoke about the girl's death.

“Whether you knew the girl or not, whether you shed a tear or not, it was a very emotionally draining day,” staff member Tony Rupe said. “By the end of the day I was worn out because you wanted so much to help the kids.”

Rupe works as a parking lot attendant at the school. He said he usually patrols the parking lots during the day, but on Friday he spent most of his day inside because seniors weren’t allowed to go out to lunch.

“It wasn’t because we thought kids would go home, it was because we didn’t want them driving while they were so distracted,” Rupe said.

“If kids wanted to go home they were able to call their parents and get excused,” Rupe said.   “We had some kids go home and come back because they didn’t want to be alone.”

'I never met anyone that didn't like her'

In the school newsletter this month, the girl was recognized with the “Who’s Your Falcon” award, which is given monthly to students, staff and parent volunteers who “go above and beyond,” according to the newsletter.

She was one of 10 students to receive the recognition.

“She was the kind of girl who cared about people and was always there for someone if they needed help,” Rochester senior Brady Crites said.

“I never met anyone that didn’t like her."

Crites said she interviewed Brady once for the yearbook club, which she was very
involved in, because he played lacrosse.

“As soon as it came over the announcement speakers the entire school fell silent,” Crites said.

Principal Wendy Zdeb said this in a message sent to parents on Friday: "It has been an emotional day at RHS.  We are here to support the students and staff as they grieve the loss of a dear friend, classmate and involved student. "

Zdeb said the girl's family would appreciate donations of food and gift cards to help with visiting family members; these items can be dropped off at the school office on Monday.

With tragedy comes awareness

Michelle Lynch, a licensed psychologist who specializes in helping children and teens, encouraged parents to talk with their children over the weekend about what happened.

“Even if your child didn’t know this girl, it’s important for parents to talk about it,” said Lynch of Abaris Behavior Health in Rochester Hills.

“It is a horrific tragedy for the family and for the school community, but it can be used to open up awareness about what teens are feeling,” Lynch said. “My hope is that by raising awareness, we will avoid tragedies like this in the future.”

Feelings of teen suicide are highly treatable, Lynch said. Symptoms include personality and appetite changes, a loss of interest in favorite activities, giving away personal items and withdrawing from family and friends.

Even if a teen is talking about death or suicide in a joking manner, it could be a clue that they are putting those thoughts out there.

Lynch suggested parents attend any planned memorial services with their children. (Funeral services for the girl are pending.) “It’s important to help them see the preciousness of life,” Lynch said. “There is no problem that can’t be solved — there is always a way and a solution,” she said.

For help, call the Oakland County Crisis Hotline at 800-231-1127 or Common Ground crisis center at 248-456-1991.